Man Wakes Up To Find A Penis Has Been Drawn On His Face, Then Proceeds To Go Beat His Roommate Up Because Of It

ARLNow– A prank turned violent in the Lyon Village neighborhood on Saturday (March 23) when a man reportedly was beaten for drawing a penis on his roommate’s face.

The alleged incident happened on the 3100 block of 17th Street N. According to Arlington County Police, 31-year-old James Watson fell asleep on his couch after a night of drinking. He woke up around 5:30 a.m. and became furious when he discovered the permanent marker drawings on his face, police said.

Police say that Watson, suspecting his roommate, ran upstairs to where the roommate was sleeping and jumped on top of him, repeatedly punching him in the face. The commotion awakened a third roommate, who managed to separate the two.

The victim reportedly waited about an hour and a half to call the police while deciding whether or not to press charges. He did end up calling for help and police charged Watson with malicious wounding. The injured man’s eye was swollen shut and bleeding, so the third roommate drove him to the hospital for treatment, according to police.

Cops say the roommates admitted they sometimes play pranks on each other while intoxicated.


This is why you can’t just roommate with any Joe Schmo you find.  Yeah he’s willing to pay his share, but his sense of humor may not be ideal.  We all know that if you fall asleep with his shoes on you’re fair game for any prank.  That’s a law of drinking.  Also, another law is if you are constantly playing pranks on each other, you cant get made when you get got.  That’s a man code.  Therefore, we need to know if James fell asleep with his shoes on.  That’s the clear evidence for this case.  The turning point for right and wrong.

No one likes waking up with dick on their face, but then again, it was fake dick.  Its not like James woke up and his roommate was just resting his snake on his cheek.  Wake the fuck up, realize you have penis drawn on your face, and grab some Dial soap and wash that bitch off.  Then when you see your roommate tell that motherfucker he got you good and just wait until the payback.  That’s that.  Nothing more needs to be done.

Unless your James Watson and you wash your face only to realize there’s still a penis outline on your cheek.  Then you become furious, head to your roommates bedroom and beat the shit out of him.  And by looking at his mugshot, I’m assuming that’s exactly what happened.  Permanent marker is no joke.  If I’m James, I’m hoping my 5 o’clock shadow grows in real quick.  Can’t be socializing with the public with Sharpie dick on your face.

PS, Thank Baby J none of my friends are assholes like James’ roommate.  Had I ever woken up with dick drawn on my face, ChefBoyRD and STL would’ve definitely both had bleeding eyes that were swollen shut.  That’s a fact.


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