Ray Lewis May Have Taken Deer Antler Velvet Which Apparently Is A Banned Substance Under NFL’s Drug Policy… Who Knew?


deer_antler_velvet_extract_grande

Pro Football Talk – The good news is that linebacker Ray Lewis may not be facing many questions about a 13-year-old controversy during media day.  The bad news is that there’s a fresh topic into which the assembled reporters will want to delve when Lewis and the Ravens gather at the Superdome for the annual exercise in journalistic hysteria.

According to Sports Illustrated, Lewis contacted a company owned by a former male stripper to obtain a deer-antler velvet extract after tearing his triceps in October.

Mitch Ross of S.W.A.T.S reportedly videotaped the phone call from Lewis.

“Spray on my elbow every two hours?” Lewis asked Ross regarding the extract, via Philly.com.  (Quotes from the conversation don’t appear in the free online version of the Sports Illustrated article; presumably, Philly.com gleaned the info from the full article.)

“No,” Ross said.  “Under your tongue.”

Later, Lewis asked Ross to “just pile me up and just send me everything you got, because I got to get back on this this week.”

The problem for Lewis is that the extract contains IGF-1, which is on the NFL’s list of banned substances.  For the NFL, the problem is that Lewis will retire after Sunday.  So there’s really nothing that can be done — unless Lewis admits to it on Tuesday and the league puts the investigative process into the highest gear possible.

Even then, it’s impossible that the matter would progress through all available appeals before Sunday night.

 

There it is, folks.  The story every Ray Lewis hater was waiting for… the steroid, PED story.  Cant say I’m real surprised considering literally everyone does steroids.  I wouldnt be surprised if Tom Brady and Peyton Manning came out tomorrow and announced that they too take steroids.  Only person I know who doesnt is Roger Goodell and thats because he sucks at his job.  If he did take steroids he’d be the best commish of all-time.

I love these players reaching for shit too.  They’ll take anything even if its made for animals.  Horse hormones? Give it to me.  Deer antler velvet? I have to put this shit under my tongue?  Sounds good.  Give me a bunch.  Just keep piling it up on me.  Gotta get back to playing football.

These guys treat this shit like its the end of the world. Like they have no other way of life. Like they’ll die if they dont get back in a week.  When these guys tell you that every game is more important than their last, its true.  When they tell you that getting to the Super Bowl isnt guaranteed and that when you get their, appreciate it.. thats also true.  Just look at Ray Ray.  Who knows if he actually took them, but he was so desperate he was willing to consume deer antler velvet just to have the opportunity to play football in the playoffs and POSSIBLY play in the Super Bowl.

PS, Poor Ray Ray.  In his firs Super Bowl he was bombarded with questions about killing men.  Now in his second, its all about whether he ate deer antler velvet.  Cant get away from the scrutiny.  Everybody Hates Ray.

PSS, What a fuckin’ name, huh?  Immortal Velvet? Fuckin’ killer for a steriod/banned substance.  I need to meet the creative team behind that.  Have them help me market the shit out of Water Cooler.  Also, have them send me a few bottles and see if it’ll improve my dying lungs.  Im basically at the athletes mindset where I’ll take anything.  Lets get to gettin’, Immortal Velvet.

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One thought on “Ray Lewis May Have Taken Deer Antler Velvet Which Apparently Is A Banned Substance Under NFL’s Drug Policy… Who Knew?

  1. Pingback: This just in: Everyone is on steroids. Also, Easter Bunny possibly not real. | aidanfromworcester

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