Fuck Vinny Guadagnino. And fuck his last name. The shit is too hard to spell. You know when you have to Google a Googled name just to verify its correctiveness, its too fucking long and difficult. And who is he to get to bang this? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I guess I don’t hate him hate him, I’m more so jealous as fuck. I mean, where is my Melanie Iglesias? I was all about Kate Upton until I found out her standards were low enough to date Justin Verlander and then she kind of lost me. Now, don’t get me wrong, she’s flyer than fly. That’s my girl. But if Kate’s #1, Melanie is #1B.
And if you’re wondering, yes, I watched the entire video. Never got bored. I was actually looking forward to the next costume and at one point was trying to guess what she’s was dressing up as next. Also, if you ask me which costume was my favorite, I’d answer the prison bikini with handcuffs. But if you’re asking me which one I’d want in the bedroom it’d be the cop, with the prison bikini on underneath. Nothing like her getting tough and trying to put me in my place as a cop, only for me to be able to turn the tables with her as the prisoner at the end. And who doesn’t love handcuffs in the bedroom. At one point I was freaked out by them, but upon using them I have no idea what I was worried about. Jackpot discovery!