In Other News, A Jersey City Man Strips Naked, Shits In Police Car And Chews Off His Own Finger

NY Daily News – A New Jersey man possibly high on PCP hit the trifecta of freakish rampages over the weekend when he stripped his clothes, defecated in the back of a police cruiser, and gnawed off his own finger. Authorities say they found Jargget Washington, 29, nude and belligerent at a Jersey City intersection around 8:00 p.m. on Sunday night. He allegedly “tried pulling a driver out of a car,” but the driver managed to fight back, according to the New York Daily News. Police restrained Washington and transferred him to Jersey City Medical Center, where he became increasingly uncontrollable. Washington reportedly spat at officers and chewed on his own wrists, devouring his medical bracelet. Following the evaluation, Washington — still dressed in a hospital gown — reportedlydefecated in the back seat of a police car as authorities transported him to the Hudson County Jail, the Jersey Journal reports. Once at the jail, Washington chewed off his own finger and swallowed it, according to CBS New York.


You ever have one of those ragers of a weekend where Monday morning just kicks you in the dick? Its a crazy night, you get trashed- maybe a little high, and you wake up the next morning in a jail cell for taking a random shit somewhere and you find out you broke your diet by cheating and eating unsanctioned foods? Well multiply that by a hundred billion and you get Jargget Washington’s Sunday night. The guy got high on PCP, striped down to his skivvies, took a shit in a cop car and consumed his own finger. Yup. Just a typical Sunday night after watching a days worth of football. Apparently this dude was a Jets fan and couldn’t take this past weekend’s loss to the Patriots. Probably had a few dollar bills placed with some bookie who now owns his life, so he figured, “might as well Hannibal Lecter myself and get placed in jail.” Gambling is no joke, people. I’m a few hundred dollars in debt, and I’m not talking student loans. And that’s just within the last year.


Ps, I just had to wear a hospital bracelet for 9 days. I absolutely hated it. However, I never at one point thought to chew on my own wrist and consume my hospital bracelet.



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