Huffpost Crime – A Texas woman has been arrested on charges that she impersonated a doctor in a bizarre scheme to trick a friend into engaging in a lesbian love affair and becoming her life partner. Angela Buchanan, 30, of Lufkin, Texas, has been charged with online impersonation, a Class A misdemeanor. If convicted, she faces up to a year in jail. According to the arrest affidavit, Buchanan contacted a longtime friend on Yahoo Messenger in March, saying she had breast cancer in 2008 and was now suffering from a pre-cancerous mass. Buchanan’s friend was later contacted by the doctor on Yahoo Messenger. Unbeknownst to the woman, the individual posing as “Doc” was actually Buchanan pretending to be a doctor, police said. “[The victim] [said] that ‘Doc’ advised that the pre-cancerous mass in Buchanan’s breast could possibly be delayed or cured by an increase in certain hormone production,” the affidavit said. “‘Doc’ advised that this hormone production could be stimulated by sexual intercourse. ‘Doc’ began to recommend to [the victim] that she participate in sexual activity [with Buchanan] in order to bolster this hormone production and possibly save her friend’s life.”
How dumb is this 51-year old broad? That’d be like me coming home from a doctors appointment and being like “ah honey, the doctors said my CF is getting worse. Apparently the only thing that can help me is a bolster of hormone production. He recommended lots of sex with you, and to have you perform multiple blow jobs throughout the day. I know hun, but its doctor’s orders. I have the prescription right here.”
Yeah I can see that going over swimmingly. But as a sane, honest human-being I’d stop my pursuit at that. But this bitch? This bitch went all out. She hunted her prey down via Yahoo Messenger (honestly who uses Yahoo Messenger anymore), then she posed as a fake doctor with a fake disease with a fake cure, and to top off this sundae she convinced the woman to marry her in order to help her win a custodial battle for kids who weren’t even real. Fuckin’ genius! Give this bitch an Emmy for real. Only thing that would have put this story over the top is if she would have turned the woman.
Ps, how sad is it that it took the woman’s daughter to suspect something was fishy before she started looking into her friend’s story. And on top of that, where was the rest of her family and friends? Everybody was cool with this? They all thought she was her friend’s keeper?
Pss, if none of her family and friends knew about this, I need to know her secret. I can’t even text a broad without a half dozen people finding out and asking within 2-3 days, never mind banging them out and marrying them.
Psss, I feel like less of a man for Google searching mastectomy. Can’t believe as a boob man I was unaware of this term.